Ugh, Srsly, ugh.
We all know, of course, that we should never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever fiddle around in any way with electric devices. Never.
Page 155, Chapter 11, 'The Reptile Room', Lemony Snicket (via aseriesofunfortunatequotes)
Mr.Poe: Count Olaf, you're under arrest!
Count Olaf: ...
Count Olaf: ...
Count Olaf: I came out to have I good time and I am honestly feeling so attacked right now
Tears are curious things, for like earthquakes or puppet shows they can occur at any time, without any warning and without any good reason.
Lemony Snicket, The Wide Window (via screamingcrawfish)
One of the most troublesome things in life is that what you do or do not want has very little to do with what does or does not happen.
Lemony Snicket - The Carnivorous Carnival (via quotablebookquotes)

scatterdarknessscattersilence:

I love that His Dark Materials has a race of tiny people who act as spies but really don’t have the temperament for it

They’re like “yeah this gig is balls, we’d rather be warriors but I keep getting stuck hiding in fucking bookcases”

his-dark-materials-series:

http://dokdibujos.deviantart.com/art/Lyra-72134479

Oh god. Oh no. So cute. Christ.

shewasbornin1989:

Asriel: I ask for one kid and you bring me my daughter?!?!?!?
Lyra: I came out to have a good time and I’m honestly feeling so attacked right now

HA! Goddamnit. Goddamnit this is great.

How ‘bout a girl who’s got a brain
Who always speaks her mind?

Yes please.